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The truth untold

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There is a day where you feel like everything seems fine. The sparks in her eyes feels alive and none of them realise the silence she kept in her mind. Thousand thoughts. Numbness. Empty. She is there but her mind is out of nowhere. She kept the silence for years and now she believes that, none of her thoughts gonna be reality. She had finally realised that she is actually unwanted and should have make up her mind that she need to build the walls as high as no one could break it anymore. She turned out to be clueless. Is it worth her lifetime? After all those years, she wanted to see herself genuinely happy with her life. She thought the silence tears is bearable but then; today is the remarkable day as the tears had finally come to the downfall. She step forward and tell herself, at least you know the truth now rather than let yourself drown again. She convinced herself until she has finally close her eyes. Her heart is aching.  Her hand is shaking. The tears keep falling even her...
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Daily Routine.

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Dear moon,  I don’t know how to start it but all I can say that I’m weak like seriously weak. Lately, I can’t sleep properly. I tried so hard to sleep well but I just can’t and couldn’t find any proper reasons for this thing. Sometimes I just wanna shout and cry bcs im too tired but why I couldn’t sleep? I need to have enough sleep since I got lots of chores to do on the next day. There’s one day, I’m too tired and already felt sleepy on 9pm. So, I make up my mind to sleep and the last time before I finally can close my eyes, I looked into my watch… and it’s 9.37pm. I felt nothing and I guess I sleep well on that time. But time flies so slow.. for sudden, I woke up on 11.55pm. LIKE SERIOUSLY? I still felt tired but why? Why I already woke up? I need to go to sleep back! But after few hours struggling to close my eyes… I still can’t sleep. It’s like… hm I can’t describe this feeling. And you know what, the day keep repeating again and again until now. I’m tired but only could slee...
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Changes.

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Hai, hai and assalamualaikum again. I don't know how to start my story today. But, I do feel hurt on what just happened in my life. Deeply hurt. From now on, I feel like I'm no one. I'm trying to be myself. But I can't. I'm not strong at all. And the most important thing is, I do feel like I'm a useless. Everything that I've done in my life become upside down. It goes wrong. There's no more perfect thing in my life.  Ya Allah, I wish I can turn back my life and fix my past. But I know that all I can do is nothing. Nothing will happen even I'm saying that thing for thousand times. And now, all I wanna do is.. change my attitude. I have to change my mindset. Hopefully after I change myself there will be something good will happen in my life. Maybe not now, but one day it will be. But the most important thing is I hope that my changes won't make my spm result become worst. Besides that, I really really hope that all my changes w...
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